Why Southerners Dress Up For Game-Day
It's just the Southern thing to do.
Down South, dressing up for game-day is a way of life. Don't get us wrong— we have respect for any state that honors the time-honored tradition of tailgating, but we tend to do things a bit differently down here. We love our oversized jerseys just as much as the rest of them, but those are usually reserved for away games spent grilling poolside at our best friends' homes. Game-day dresses are a closet staple for us, and we'd be lying if we said we haven't mentally laid out our outfits for the first few home games already. It's not uncommon for football fans to be on the lookout for game-day outfits year-round, because y'all, we take our football traditions very seriously. While there may not be any true rhyme or reason behind why we are the way we are, we can sum it up like this: dressing up for gameday is just the Southern thing to do. (But we'll try to break it down for you anyway.)
Dressing Down Is Nowhere In Our Vocabulary.
It's true —when you enter the South, you're entering a culture that knows no meaning associated with the word "casual." We have strict orders from higher powers (God himself? The PTA? This could be disputed until the cows come home, but I digress…) to know better than to show up at every funeral, tee ball game and grocery trip dressed to anything but the nines. Is it practical to wear 5 inch wedges and tease our hair to the high heavens knowing good and well that we'll fall victim to sore feet and high humidity once again? Absolutely not. But try to get a Southern woman to admit that out loud and let me know what happens when you do.
It's Simply Good Karma.
Look good, play good. It's only crazy if it doesn't work.
It's a Marathon, Not a Sprint.
If you thought game-day lasted within the parameters of four quarters, you've got another thing coming. From 8:00 mimosas and breakfast casseroles (a.k.a. the pregame to the pregame) to a stress-inducing four quarters and a post-game celebration on The Strip that'll put Mardi Gras to shame, our game-day outfits need to be up to the challenge. All of this is to say, if we're "playing for four and staying for four", you can bet we're going to look good doing it.
You Might As Well Be Among Royalty.
Let's not even pretend like we're not all a little starstruck by the 6-foot-something giants straddling the line between teenagerdom and their early 20's who look like they could take you down with just a brush of the shoulder. (I can confirm that this is entirely possible after sharing many a hallway with them at The University of Alabama…Roll Tide to that.) If by some slim chance Nick Saban were to peek out of those tinted windows on University Boulevard while en route via police escort to Bryant-Denny, you best believe we'll be looking our finest.
Okay, We'll Admit It…We're A Little Competitive.
In the spirit of transparency, it is always, always the goal to completely annihilate the other team while simultaneously out-dressing them. There. I said it.
We'll Look For Any Excuse To Buy A New Sundress.
Can a Southern girl ever own too many sundresses? Down South, sundresses are to women as khaki pants are to men. They're a necessity, and you're not going to convince us otherwise. After all, you never know whom you'll be running into among 100,000 of your closest friends.