Things That Bother Southerners (and Probably No One Else)
Pet peeves: Everyone has ‘em
There are a few things Southerners just can’t abide, pet peeves that are ours and ours alone. They’re twisted up into our DNA, never to be dislodged. We can always count on them to alert us when the tea’s not sweet, and they’ll sound the alarm when someone’s taken liberties with grandmama’s cornbread recipe. Try to explain these annoyances to anyone who didn’t grow up below the Mason-Dixon, and they’ll probably roll their eyes. These, however, are no small matters. They’re the stuff of strong regional preference, and, at the very least, they’re sure to elicit a “bless your heart” (the exasperated one). Things that bother Southerners? We’ll spell them out for you.
The Phrase “You All”
We have a contraction for that, y’all.
Improper Cast Iron Care
That skillet is a member of the family and should be treated as such. Season it, clean it, re-season it, repeat.
A Gravy-Less Table
If your gravy boat’s gathering dust, you’re doing it wrong. Especially on the fourth Thursday in November. (Here’s a recipe to get you started.)
California’s Peach Production
Did you know that our neighbor to the west produces more peaches than Georgia and South Carolina combined? (Don’t tell our water towers.)
The Phrase “I Don’t Eat Sweets”
Oh honey, let us introduce you to a dessert called Hummingbird Cake.
Directions That Don’t Include the Word ‘Yonder’
Keep your cardinal directions and street signs. Give us landmarks that may or may not still be standing.
How are we supposed to chat with those things in your ears?
Missing Ma’ams and Silent Sirs
When addressing your elders, you’d better do it right.
Improper Reverence for Southern Icons
Under-Deviled Deviled Eggs
It’s a science. Follow the recipe, or else.
Oh, that’s how you want to eat them?
WATCH: Things Southerners Take Credit For
What super Southern pet peeves do you harbor? Let us know the annoyances you always find yourself explaining to non-Southerners.