Southern Traditions We Want to Bring Back–And You Will Too!

By Melissa Locker
Smith Collection/Gado/Getty Images

While we realize that the days of white gloves and calling cards may be gone, good manners and solid traditions should never go out of style. After all, Southern gentility, hospitality, and good manners are as central to a Southerner’s identity as sipping a glass of sweet tea on a hot day. While the world is changing, things like humility, courtesy, and basic politeness are mainstays of any civilized society and that should never change

Start Slideshow

1 of 25

Here are some of our favorites.

Advertisement
Advertisement

2 of 25

Saying Please and Thank You

George Marks/Retrofile/Getty Images

Saying please and thank you are the bedrock of human civility. Children who have just learned to talk can master the art of expressing gratitude, yet many adults have seemingly forgotten the skill.

3 of 25

Saying Sir and Ma’am

Hirz/Getty Images

When children call adults sir or ma’am it is a sign of respect and teaching children to respect each other and their elders is important. As the Manners Mentor website says, “Respect is so important to emphasize to our children because it’s the cornerstone of other invaluable character traits such as tolerance, selflessness, giving, and compassion.”

Advertisement

4 of 25

Proper Table Manners

George Rinhart/Corbis via Getty Images

You don’t have to know the proper placement of an oyster fork in a formal table setting to have good table manners. The rules are the same for children or adults: Put your napkin in your lap, talk to people on your left and your right, wait until everyone has their food before eating, and, of course, no phones at the dinner table. (As for that oyster fork, it goes to the right of the spoons, according to Emily Post.)

5 of 25

Cursive

Harold M. Lambert/Lambert/Getty Images

Cursive writing has been around since at least the 19th century and there’s no reason that it should die out now just because youngsters prefer texting. Plus, the flowing nature of cursive makes writing thank you cards and Christmas letters that much easier.

6 of 25

Handwritten Thank You Notes

George Marks/Retrofile/Getty Images

Gracious guests always send thank you cards to their hosts as soon as possible after the event. It’s the least you can do to thank them for their hospitality and text messages just don’t carry the same gratitude as a handwritten note.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

7 of 25

Recipe Cards

Brianna Soukup/Portland Press Herald via Getty Images

When picnic companions beg for the recipe for your lemon Bundt cake, you could just send them a link (to SouthernLiving.com, of course), but it’s far nicer to write out the recipe on a card for sharing.

8 of 25

Sunday Suppers

Lambert/Getty Images

Between PTA meetings, after-school baseball practice, and youth group gatherings, it can be hard for busy families to sit down together for every meal. Sunday supper, though, should be a non-negotiable, can’t miss event. It’s the perfect time for families to share a meal, catch up and, well, be a family.

9 of 25

Holding the Door for Others

Fox Photos/Getty Images

If you’ve gone to the trouble of opening the door, it’s easy enough to hold it for another minute or two to help the person using the door after you. Naturally, if someone does hold the door for you, be sure to say thank you as you walk through.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

10 of 25

Welcoming New Neighbors

Harold M. Lambert/Lambert/Getty Images

When someone moves to the neighborhood or the apartment complex, make them feel like they’ve really come home. Bake them a banana bread or an apple pie, or if you’re not a baker, simply buy an assortment of treats that will make them feel welcome.

11 of 25

Good Handshake

General Photographic Agency/Getty Images

Make a good first impression with a solid handshake that won’t leave your new friend wishing they had never stuck out their hand. If you’re not sure where your handshake rates, ask your most honest friend for an assessment.

12 of 25

Phone Calls

Archive Photos/Getty Images

Yes, it’s easier to text, but phone calls are a much better way to catch up with a friend or family member

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

13 of 25

Punctuality

Cleland Rimmer/Getty Image

We’re all busy, so don’t be rude by showing up late. When you make a plan, stick to it, and don’t waste someone else’s time by failing to live up to your word.

14 of 25

Church Hats

Kirn Vintage Stock/Corbis via Getty Images

Dressing up for church is a Southern tradition and for women that frequently topping your outfit with a church hat. Whether you opt for a chapeau that is elegant, bold, understated, or over-the-top is between you and your fashion gods, although perhaps be mindful of whoever has to sit behind you in church.

15 of 25

Smiling at Strangers

Leonard Mccombe/The LIFE Images Collection/Getty Images

While strangers get a bad rap, as William Butler Yeats said, strangers are “only friends you haven’t yet met” and that is particularly true in the South. The art of turning strangers into friends starts with a smile.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

16 of 25

Eye Contact

George Marks/Retrofile/Getty Images

Making eye contact is the easiest way to let someone know that you see them and recognize their shared humanity. When you shake someone’s hand, make eye contact. When you pass someone on the street or at the grocery store, make eye contact— and perhaps even smile.

17 of 25

Hospitality (Open Door Policy)

Bettmann/Contributor/Getty Images

True Southern hospitality means an open-door policy to family, neighbors, co-workers, friends, friends of friends, and even friendly strangers. While times have changed enough that you do need to trust your instincts, generally, when someone shows up on your porch, greet them with a smile and maybe a glass of sweet tea.

18 of 25

Helping Your Neighbors in Times of Happiness and Sorrow

Jamie Hodgson/Getty Images

The rules are simple: Is there a new baby in the neighborhood? Bring them a casserole. Is your neighbor mourning a loss? Bring them a casserole. While the casserole is negotiable, the act of showing your neighbors that you support them through food (or flowers or some other creative idea) is not.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

19 of 25

RSVP

Housewife/Getty Images

While Southerners are known for their hospitality and will undoubtedly always greet a friend with a smile, it’s still polite to let your hostess know whether or not you plan to take them up on their offer. Email, text, or (gasp!) call to give regrets or ask what you can bring to the event.

20 of 25

Loyalty

Dr. Paul Wolff & Tritschler/Corbis via Getty Images

Picking a side and sticking to it, is just another example of living up to your word. Be loyal to your family, your friends, your sorority, your football team, your state, and your country.

21 of 25

Hostess Gifts

George Marks/Retrofile/Getty Images

When someone has invited you into their home, grab a bottle of wine or champagne or bring your hosts your favorite pralines or divinity for them to enjoy later.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement

22 of 25

No Gossiping

Ivan Dmitri/Michael Ochs Archives/Getty Images

If there is anything that we learned from multiple viewings of Steel Magnolias is that it’s almost impossible to avoid gossiping at the beauty parlor—and same goes for brunch or book club. It’s hard to avoid gossip, but it’s important to try.

23 of 25

Avoiding Swearing in Public

Underwood Archives/Getty Images

On a similar note, for gentility’s sake, try to avoid swearing in public. It’s not always possible, but any Southern woman should be able to make her point loud and clear without swearing. For proof, look no further than Designing Women’s Julia Sugarbaker.

24 of 25

Sunday Best

Smith Collection/Gado/Getty Images

Getting everyone out the door to church or brunch or both on a Sunday morning can be a challenge—and trying to put a tie on a little boy or wrestling a baby into tights can drive many to prayer—but donning your Sunday best is still a tradition worth keeping. Just remember, it is only once a week.

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement
Replay gallery

Share the Gallery

Up Next

Popular in Southern Culture

All Topics in Southern Culture

Advertisement