25 Things Only Southern Grandmothers Say
Nobody rules the roost like a Southern grandmother. The only person on earth who can rein in Mama is her Mama. And if you want to have a prayer of going out with that boy Daddy's not so high on, get his mother on your side.
When it comes to her grandchildren—precious angels every one—Memaw wields a velvet hammer, softening the blow of a disapproving glance with a teacake, or taking the edge off of "you girls better get in this house" with an invitation to try on her good jewelry.
We asked our Facebook Brain Trust to share their favorite grandmother quotes and grandma sayings. Here's what they remembered—share your memorable Memaw quotes in comments:
- "Did you forget to put on your lipstick, honey? Here, dab on a little bit of mine in case we see somebody we know at Publix."
- "I wish you'd look a-yonder. A woman her age hasn't got a bit of business wearing such as that."
- "I don't mind feeling this way, but I sure do hate to look like this."
- "Yes, what? It's yes, ma'am, when you're talking to me, little mister."
- "If you do that again, Granny's fixing to thump your head!"
- "Well, bless!"
- "That's worse than burnt okra stuck to the pan."
- "I hope this is fit to eat."
- "Just remember—Mamaw knows everything and has eyes in the back of her head."
- "I can see you're upset, but you just better get glad in the same clothes you got mad in."
- "You children want a sammich for lunch?"
- "Bless your heart! C'mere and show Mimi your skinned knee so she can kiss it well."
- "Don't you sass me!"
- "You're not too old for your wants to hurt you!"
- "Come in here and let Memaw fix you a plate."
- "Why, honey, there's nothing to a pound cake. Come on back to the kitchen and I'll show you how to stir one up."
- "You've got such a pretty face. Don't you wannna pull your hair back so everybody can see it?"
- "You've got such a handsome face. Don't you wanna get rid of that beard so everybody can see it?"
- "You kids [who are all over 30] carry your plates out on the porch so we'll have enough room for the grown folks at the big table."
- "Y'all come see me now, sweetheart!"
- "Lordy mercy sakes alive!"
- "What my mother said to me: 'I would never lay a hand on my grandson!' What my mother said to my son: 'You better get in here right now or I'm gonna tan your hide.' She had the bluff on both of us."
- "Bill . . . I mean Rowdy . . . I mean Tracy . . . I mean Jody . . . Lord, I can't keep all you grandkids straight!"
- "I am give out."
- "This tastes pretty good even if I did make it."
You know she's going to recommend that you respect your family, be gracious and kind, and maybe put on some lipstick. Got a tube of Revlon Love That Red?