How To Be the Most Well-Spoken Person in a Room
Finding the right words to say can be challenging even in everyday conversations. Being consistently articulate and prepared for a chat can seem like an insurmountable mountain to climb, but there are a few tips and tricks everyone can use to become the most eloquent person in the room.
Coaches, reading specialists, and speaking experts provide some basic etiquette for conservation that can help you in any situation—whether you are with family, friends, co-workers, or complete strangers. These tips can help you the next time you're nervous in a crowded room or attending a function where you don't know many people. Here is some advice on being the most well-spoken person in any room and remaining confident in all conversations.
Read a lot
"Reading is a great habit to further one's talking or articulation," Kumar Narain wrote on Quora. "Reading builds knowledge, sentence structures, relationships and flow, understanding of cause-effect, what-if, assertions-negations, understanding of complexity in our character and behavior, and so much more. Reading also gives confidence and context, both very beneficial to speaking."
Take a deep breath
"Speech comes from breath. Breathing well will make your voice stronger," Lat Nayar, a transformational coach who noted he suffered from stammering until he was 14, wrote on the same Quora thread. "You will be able to pause at the right moments when you speak and not end in a squeak because you ran out of breath. Your speech will be much smoother with proper breathing."
Practice your speed
According to Carol A. Fleming, Ph.D. author of It's The Way You Say It, practicing your craft is key to sounding articulate. As she explained to Reader's Digest, you can do this by copying and pasting a 160-word passage into a word document. Then, read the passage out loud and record your voice. It should take about one minute to read, according to Fleming. "Aim for about 155 to 175 words per minute for normal conversation," she said. If you're going too fast, try slowing it down with a few breaths.
Listen to others before speaking
"I used to think speaking well was just about 'speaking.' I was wrong," Nayar added in his Quora post. "Being articulate and coherent is also a measure of how good you are as a listener. You would not be considered coherent if you don't understand the relevance of what is being discussed. So, listen well." As he importantly added, "Then, pause with attention. It is a sign of respect."
"You should be capable of talking with enough intensity so that anyone who's 15-20 feet away can clearly understand you," Tim Enalls, founder of IdeaGenius.com, wrote on Quora. "Practice talking at this intensity so that people can clearly understand you and follow what you're saying, thereby drawing favorable attention to yourself."
Get rid of filler words like "um"
"One of the functions of "Um" is to tell your audience that you're not done talking yet and need to gather your thoughts," Forbes contributor Selena Rezvani wrote in a post. She further explained that the best way to get rid of these words is to listen to a recording of yourself, learn your trigger points, and train your way out of using those words. "Let's move on to…', 'Another important consideration is…', and 'Let's transition to talking about…' are great replacements."
"In one of the hilarious scenes from the Big Bang Theory, Leonard sarcastically rebounds at Sheldon for how it's not actual swimming if you learn to do it on dry floor rather than in actual water," Fatima Sarwar explained on Quora. "Crux being, some things only come from doing them in 'deep waters,' by making mistakes, and by eventually getting confident by learning from those mistakes. So start working towards that confidence!"