33 Quotes from The Golden Girls Guaranteed To Make Your Day
The very best banter from Blanche, Dorothy, Rose, and Sophia.No matter how long ago the show may have aired, The Golden Girls will always hold a special place in our hearts. What a crew: Betty, Beatrice, Rue, Estelle (better known as Rose, Dorothy, Blanche, and Sophia). That group of girlfriends in Florida have each been nominated for (and won) just about every award out there – from Emmy Awards to Golden Globes. The Golden Girls is considered one of the best-written TV series of all time, and for good reason: the women of The Golden Girls are each funny, bright, and (somewhat) relatable. No matter which Golden Girl you relate to– this gang gives us all hope for a vibrant and vivacious future of female friendships. Although it’s hard to pick just 17 quotables, we’ve narrowed down the show’s funniest moments guaranteed to make you laugh out loud. Relive the glory days of The Golden Girls with these hilarious quotes from the iconic series, and grab a snack and sit down for a 7-season-long marathon.
"Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping." -Blanche
"People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever's in the glass." -Sophia
"Go to sleep, sweetheart. Pray for brains." -Dorothy
"It's like we say in St. Olaf—Christmas without fruitcake is like St. Sigmund's Day without the headless boy." -Rose
Dorothy: I have a date
Blanche: With a man?
Dorothy: No, Blanche. With a Venus Fly Trap.
"Well, nobody ever believes me when I'm telling the truth. I guess it's the curse of every devastatingly beautiful woman." -Blanche
Dorothy: Rose, what are you listening to?
Rose: A relaxation tape. The rain is supposed to relax me.
Dorothy: Is it working?
Rose: Not really. I keep worrying that I left my car windows down.
Dorothy: Oh, c'mon Blanche. Age is just a state of mind.
Blanche: Tell that to my thighs.
"Isn't it amazing how I can feel so bad, and still look so good?" -Blanche
Rose: Tell me, is it possible to love two men at the same time.
Blanche: Set the scene, have we been drinking?
"I've been having a good time, and there wasn't even a man in the room." -Blanche
Dorothy: Ma, I have a feeling you're lying.
Rose: Dorothy, be positive.
Dorothy: Okay, I'm positive you're lying.
Dorothy: You know what's young to me now? Forty. Suddenly, forty is young.
Blanche: Oooh... aren't you sweet.
"No! No, I will not have a nice day!" -Dorothy
Blanche: Dorothy, what do you think I oughta do with my bed?
Dorothy: Put it in the Smithsonian, Blanche. It's got more miles on it than the spirit of St. Louis.
Dorothy: You know what your trouble is?
Blanche: Of course not.
"Have I given you any indication that I care?" -Sophia
"No matter how bad things get, remember these sage words: You’re old, you sag, get over it." -Sophia
"Jealousy is a very ugly thing, Dorothy. And so are you in anything backless." -Sophia
"It’s like life is a giant weenie roast, and I’m the biggest weenie." -Rose
"Dorothy, was Sophia naked just now or does her dress really need ironing?" -Rose
"After 80, every year without a headstone is a milestone." -Sophia
"She’s really a very sweet woman. She just doesn’t like to show it." -Dorothy
"Flirting is part of my heritage." -Blanche
"Want a glass of water to wash down your foot?" -Sophia
"Tell me the truth: Do these glasses make me look stupid?" -Rose
Rose: Can I ask a dumb question?
Dorothy: Better than anyone I know.
Rose: Where are you going?
Dorothy: To get ice cream or commit a felony. I’ll decide in the car.
My mother used to say: The older you get, the better you get. Unless you’re a banana.” -Rose
"I feel like crawling under the covers and eating a box of Velveeta." -Rose
"I hate to admit it, but he melts my Häagen-Dazs." -Rose
"It is not easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it." -Dorothy
"Look, you didn’t ask me for my opinion, but I’m old, so I’m giving it anyway." -Sophia