Life Lessons We Learned from Aunt Bee
We all wish we had one of our own.
Who didn’t love Aunt Bee from The Andy Griffith Show? She doted on Opie and made sure Andy and Opie had three square meals, clean clothes, and a tidy house. Aunt Bee had so many memorable moments on the show such as her homemade pickles for the county fair that tasted like kerosene (apparently Don Knotts’ favorite episode); becoming the warden while housing prisoners because the jail was full; leading a protest to protect the chicken farmer from being evicted only to learn he’s really a moonshiner; getting a job at a print shop that turned out to be counterfeiters; getting her pilot’s license; and the tales of her many suitors. Here are some of our favorite quotes from Aunt Bee.
“Silence is my game, Mum’s my name, tick-a-lock!”
Andy wanted to get away by himself in the mountains and asks Aunt Bee not to tell anyone. Of course, you know how that turns out!
“According to you, the Lord made two sexes….men and blabbermouths.”
To teach Andy a lesson, Aunt Bee uses a traveling shoe salesman to show him that men can gossip as much as women.
“Well, I don’t know what kind of girls they are, but from their names they sound like chorus girls or such. Tiger Lil, Brown-eyed Mary, Lindy Lou.”
Aunt Bee gets the lowdown on the new barber at Floyd’s Barbershop who turns out to be a bookie from Sarah, the town switchboard operator.
“This isn’t a living room. This is a combination closet, warehouse, wastepaper basket, and storeroom!”
Andy and Opie live like slobs while Aunt Bee is away but decide to clean up before she gets home. However they soon realize their tidiness would be sending the wrong message to Aunt Bee who needs to feel needed.
“Oh, don’t joke, honey! He’s liable to send you up to state prison."
Aunt Bee’s quip to Opie after Barney is left in charge and begins arresting upstanding townsfolk over petty violations.
“Opie, you haven’t finished your milk. We can’t put it back in the cow, you know.”
Aunt Bee always making sure Opie finishes his meal.
“Andy, that big mouth Clara is spreading rumors about me all over town.”
Clara always seems to be Aunt Bee’s rival when it comes to gentlemen callers or in the county fair competitions but deep down they’re really good friends.
“Well if it isn’t Marshall Matt Dillion! Where’s Chester?”
Andy tries to save Aunt Bee and her friends from a charming traveling medicine man whose elixir turns out to be 85% alcohol. Aunt Bee and her church ladies group partake of this magic elixir for ailments but when Andy comes home, he finds them singing and, according to Andy, “they were gassed!”
Aunt Bee’s go-to word when she’s frustrated.
“Don’t be late for suppa”
Always reminding Andy, Opie, and Barney the time supper would be on the table.
Aunt Bee: "Napkins will go on the lap."
Briscoe Darling: "I spill on my shirt; I don't spill on my pants."
Aunt Bee: "Well, nice people don't spill at all."
In order to court Aunt Bee, Briscoe Darling kidnapped her but she got the better of him by trying to reform him with table manners and dressing properly. He quickly called of the “engagement.”