For the better part of a half-century, Grumpy has been selflessly and accurately answering all of your garden questions, no matter how complex or elementary. The reason I do this, dear reader, is to convince you that by building on little successes, you'll see that gardening is the most gratifying of all human endeavors.
Thus, I am exceedingly perturbed when people say, "Gardening is too hard. There is so much to learn. I just know if I plant something, I'll kill it."
Of course you will! Everyone who has ever gardened since Adam and Eve has killed a plant. That's how we figure out what works and what doesn't.
So in this spirit of learning by doing, Grumpy hereby presents his "50 Golden Rules of Gardening."