Steve Bender

 

Grumpy's readers have confirmed it! Well, at least two of them have! When chigger bites torture you, stop the itch immediately by wetting them with blue Listerine! And all you thought it was good for was gingivitis and bad breath!

The truth was first revealed to me by Sue Ellis of North Carolina, who commented on a blog post, "I am so allergic to chiggers (and NEVER have seen one) that the top layer of my epidermis seems to 'dissolve' around a bite. The best thing for removing that appalling itch is....BLUE LISTERINE. BLUE LISTERINE. BLUE LISTERINE."

What was the cure again? Oh yeah. BLUE LISTERINE.

Last week, Shirley Smith corroborated Sue's testimony. She commented, "I just bought the blue Listerine and have slathered it all over my chigger bites : BLESSED RELIEF. THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WHO RECOMMENDED IT. I am in LOVE with blue Listerine as of this past half hour."

This begs the following questions: What is it about blue Listerine? Will green Listerine work? What about yellow or orange or purple? Does it make a difference whether the Listerine is Advanced, Ultraclean, Total Control, Freshburst, or Cool Mint? Is the cheap store brand just as good? I want to see some university studies now. This is too important to wait on.

My friends, it is only because I care so deeply about the quality of your outdoors experiences that I pass this exciting news onto you. Stop painting chigger bites with clear nail polish like my mother told me to do. The answer is BLUE LISTERINE!

 

 

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